


That Which Cannot Heal

by Elle_gy



Category: Tsubasa: Reservoir Chronicle
Genre: AND au, AU, Acid Tokyo, Angst, CLAMP level bullshit, F/F, F/M, Fuuma's a shit, He's the best big bro, Kamui's a shit, LOTS of violence, M/M, Seishirou is the biggest shit, Subaru is a good brother, Yuuko bullshit, a lot of crying, clamp don't ruin this for me with tsubasa world chronicle, do they ever go well really, much violence, some more angst, vampire twin backstories, wishes gone bad
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-08-02
Updated: 2016-07-29
Packaged: 2018-02-11 10:17:56
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 6
Words: 7,297
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2064294
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Elle_gy/pseuds/Elle_gy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kamui wanted to argue and sneer and pretend that he's still allowed to be young and carefree. He wanted Subaru to watch him with a half-smile as he tore up his enemies and claimed to be heartless.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Wounds of Youth

I. The Wounds of Youth

_Twins, they call us._

Clack, clack, tack…old-fashioned shoes on unfortunate flooring.

_Good thing he’s following me because I don’t think I have the goddamn patience to turn around and get him-_

They arrive at a door. A locked door, of course, because when one wears so many belts and boots and other utilitarian items, one can only expect to find themselves in front of locked doors.

He fumbles for a minute looking through his numerous pockets – _If that little self-absorbed pig Fuuma stole it while he was busy manhandling me earlier I swear to God I’ll –_ and finds it, with no small annoyance, in the pocket that he always puts it in.

Finally the door is pushed open (assertively)

_Did I dent the wall?_

_…Do I really care…?_

And home, at least home for the last few years, greeted the two with its usual melancholy greyness. It’s a small room, and very compartmentalized – such is a post-apocalyptic lifestyle. There is a small bed coated with rough blankets that were probably roughly made. There is no other furniture, because nothing else is needed. Only a yawning window adorns the far wall. It hisses as the rain hits it.

_Home sweet fucking home how I hate this place whywhywhy-_

Carelessly, blinded, he put his first foot through the doorway and then the second he brought through too quickly –

           - _whywhy can’t we leave right now it’s not fair-_

And of course there was the raised floorboard that would have otherwise be glaringly obvious -  


- _the ground? I’m on the ground? I’m on the ground and it’s just not fair whywhywhy isn’t it ever fair?_

_They call us twins._

Slowly and all too gracefully another pair of feet safely crossed the rouge floorboard.

Somehow, Oh! Somehow, the sting and shock is more painful than two years of loneliness and acid rain and an insane clone tearing at his arm and even Fuuma’s awful awful truths. And he sits there, against the hard wall and the harder floor –

_I swear I come in and out this room five times a day, and Subaru hasn’t even been here once –_

_Twins. Twins by fate, not by age. And with age comes wisdom._

And he can’t get up. He is shaking, shaking and he can feel his face _oh no God I’m too old for this_ painting itself crimson.

_Stupid stupid Fuuma why did he have to? Why did he have to be? I thought that – I thought that maybe – I hoped he – he shouldn’t have told me. No, he should have told me earlier. WHY didn’t he tell me? Back when – when –_

“I’m sorry.”

It wasn’t the apology he really wanted to hear, but it was soft and protective right in his ear and suddenly he was aware of Subaru’s arms pressed tightly around his frame.

“I didn’t mean to leave you. I didn’t want you to have to grow up so fast and so alone, little brother.”

He trembled in short bursts and tucked his head into Subaru’s shoulder. Maybe there, he hoped, Subaru wouldn’t notice the _liquid asteroids_ tears heavily rimming his eyes.

“It was awful, wasn’t it? I can tell. You fretted over me day and night, I know it. What a good brother I have. I am lucky.”

Subaru began stroking his back, in hopes to quell the shaking.

“It hurts, doesn’t it, little brother? I know it hurts. But I promise that someday it will hurt less.”

Kamui wanted to argue and sneer and pretend that he’s still allowed to be young and carefree. He wanted Subaru to watch him with a half-smile as he tore up his enemies and claimed to be heartless, or at least ruthless. If only for a second, he wanted to be the troublesome twin that is quick to anger, quick to excitement, and secretly all too quick to trust.

And maybe then he understood the weariness in his brother’s eyes; he finally realized the true burden of heartbreak.

He understood what makes one old.

_Twins by similar circumstance._

After an epoch of trembling and painpainpain, he was finally able to lie limp like a corpse in Subaru’s arms. He kept his head buried in the familiar fabric of Subaru’s cloak, worried that his face was glowing pink and wet. Subaru knew it was.

He had felt the protruding knobs of Kamui’s spine, and as he pulled away from the embrace, he felt the sharp corners of ribs through Kamui’s clothing.

“Kamui?”

Deprived of Subaru’s cloak, Kamui had let his face fall into his hands and his hair fall over his brow.

“Mmph?”

“How long has it been since you fed?”

“Not as long as you.”

Subaru playfully poked his younger brother in the side. He was rewarded with a slight twitch and a small “Hey-.”

“I was hibernating. That doesn’t count.”

Subaru gathered Kamui’s hair in his hands and gently tugged his head up to face him. He saw what he expected – big, round eyes plated and shiny with anguish; pale cheeks flushed and lightly luminescent; small, ovular lips pressed into a delicate line; messy bangs used as an attempted curtain to hide the weakness – and it was so incredibly lovely. Tragedy was quite infamously becoming.

“I’m fine.” Kamui whispered. Timidity laced his voice. He pleaded, even, “We should just go now.”

Subaru shook his head with quietly inarguable sternness. “We don’t know what the next world holds. I know you’re tired. Do you need me to go and get -.”

“NO!” Kamui reached up, a little less pink and embarrassed after his outburst, and grabbed Subaru’s hands. “It’s dangerous here. I – I’ll go. I’ll be quick.”

Subaru watched with both sadness and maybe a little amusement as Kamui bounded across the room and threw open the window. An incipient smile softly grew on his face. At least, he figured, his silly little Brother had the sense to put on his cloak and hood before he jumped.

_Maybe he still has a little bit of rambunctious innocence. Only young vampires like to show off like that._


	2. II. The Shepherd

II. The Shepherd

 

The ground looks as if giants tread upon it in their anguish. The bones and spines of buildings jut up into the air past their rotting flesh, twisted and broken and empty.

_Perhaps emptiness is better than pain._

And so Kamui leaps across the piles of cement ligaments and steel innards. He is a black blur, an onyx _gem_ glittering darkly in an onslaught of acid diamonds.

_The only beautiful things in a world of despair are those that are deadly._

He moves quickly away from the cemetery and into a remote region – a number of hills now full of deep caves inhabited only by bandits and thieves.

_Not that Kamui would really care about who he ate. Morals were fickle and subject to change. He was simply concerned about revealing his true nature to his comrades._

He stops. The entrance to the cave is only about six feet high, the inside is inscrutable. But Kamui can smell the scent of life thick and crimson in the air.

He lets his cloak fall silently to the floor. He slips into the shadows, barely discernable against the cave wall. Only his eyes flicker, two fireflies dancing in the night.

…

Subaru padded – quite softly - across the room and shut the window that Kamui had left open. He sat down on the very edge of the very stiff bed, looking at the hard space around him. Too many edges and corners and canvas and locks – he wasn’t jealous of his younger brother’s sparse existence. Instead, he pined for the painless, numb years wrapped up in warmth and magic tucked safely underwater.

_This world is far too cruel._

Rap rap rap – assertive knocking on an unfortunate door.

He glided across the floor (strongly conscience of the jutting floorboard that earlier ensnared his brother) and reached for the faded knob.

_Would Kamui want me to answer this? He wants everyone to think that we’ve already left._

_Kamui does not consider his comrades here his friends._

_The poor fool._

With a guilty twist, Subaru wrenched open the door.

“Fuuma-san?”

…

He can sense them further down into the cave, he can feel the heat, warmth and hate of two presences.

_Maybe a man and a woman?_

He is right. Long before he can see them, as he is moving almost glacially in order to remain silent, he can hear their rotting voices.

“How much do we have left?” A harsh, demanding baritone.

_Water thieves. Rotten water stealing bastards._

“Maybe enough for two days.” A higher voice, though equally as harsh.

_And from whom, after that, will you steal life from?_

“And if we don’t give any to the old bastards?”

_Bastards that do not protect their kin._

“Enough for four days.” There is amusement lacing her voice. And his.

Kamui sneers and moves in close enough to see their faces and identify their blood types.

_Perhaps this will be relaxing._

_…_

_It feels like little bonfires at the end of each finger._

He let all of his fingers extend into sharp claws and his eyes become smoldering embers.

Fuuma stood in the doorway, his large hand on his large head, his cheek still red, puffy and unhealed from his previous altercation with Kamui. His small orange sunglasses did little to hide the shininess of his eyes.

_Does he really have a spare pair of those…things…_

“Ah, Subaru-san, please calm down. I’m just here to-.”

“To _what?_ Haven’t you done enough already?”

And then he had that smile on his face, that awful, self-assured, carefree smile that used to belong to his brother.

“Has anyone ever seen you like this, Subaru-san? I heard from my dear older brother that you are the calm one! Has Kamui seen you like this?”

It had been a long time since Subaru had forced his eyebrows down into a firm slope and made his lips downturn into a dramatic U. He had forgotten how hard being mad was. Or how satisfying it proved to be.

…

He goes for the woman first.

_Plain clothes, plain face, skin scarred by acid._

He registers, before he whips his long claws against her head, that she has poorly kept mahogany hair and watery eyes.

_Such is a god that grants others the ability to fly._

With a sharp smack she hits the stone wall and collapses to the ground. Not dead, no, because a dead human is no good.

_Strong body, weak stomach._

Kamui turns to face the man that made no move to protect his woman. He feels both her blood dripping down his fingers and another fearful pair of eyes adhered to him. Slowly, menacingly and altogether intentionally, he lifts one of his fingers and licks her blood clean off.

_Such is a god that can strike fear into the eyes of enemies._

He becomes a fierce wind and very soon the man is cut across the neck and face.

_Thick red lines drawn like an ash cross on his forehead._

The man cannot move, only watch in disbelief as Kamui shreds his skin into ribbons of confession. Soon he is on his knees, the roughness in the floor tearing small holes in pants, his hands planted on either side and face upturned to the _altar._

_Now I am become death;_

_The destroyer of worlds._

…

“Is Kamui here?”

“No.”

“Not very talkative, are we? Oh well, that’s fine. I wanted to talk to you, not him.”

“No.”

Fuuma pushed past him into the room, ignoring the violence gushing from his frown.

He settled himself on the edge of the bed as if he’s been in the room before.

“What was your relationship with my brother?” Subaru was directly in front of Fuuma then, so quickly that he doubted the fool was able to see him move.

Finally the smile cracked.

Subaru lifted a long finger to Fuuma’s neck.

“Answer me.”

“Subaru-san really is scary!”

Subaru pushed his long finger into Fuuma’s neck, enough to cause a vermilion stream to trickle down.

“I am torn, Subaru-san, in between loving two people. Have you ever experienced this? Loving two people so much, but not being allowed to love them at the same time?”

Subaru let his fingers drop and retract into human digits.

_His lovely twin and his lovely lover._

Fuuma buried his head in his hands.

_Subaru’s heart felt like it was on fire._

“Who did you choose, Subaru? Have you chosen? Is one love better than the other? Familial love – my reckless older brother, or that rare love that exists outside of your family – which is better?”

“Stop.”

“I have chosen, Subaru-san. Which is why I came here to apologize beforehand.”

…

Kamui uses one hand to raise the man up by his neck. The blood he smells from him is vile and sickly, but it will serve its purpose.

Something has changed, something massive has shifted. He can feel a tangible change of magic in the air, as if…

_Someone has arrived._

He lets the man fall to the ground, clutching his permanently disfigured face in his hands.

_Someone powerful, someone important, someone…_

The power is pulsating from the government building, from this distance Kamui cannot determine exactly where in the building that it’s coming from. But instincts and the heavy pressure of dread tell him that Seishirou would not have landed anywhere besides the reservoir.

_I am the good shepherd…_

And in a flash of darkness he is gone, stopping only to reclaim the cloak that he left at the entrance of the cave.

_Once again he is dancing among the carcasses of buildings, and yet this dance is more frenzied than his last. Now he has become a blackbird, turning and twisting his dark small body through the rain and cement._

He is sure that Subaru is already where Seishirou is, and so descends to the lowest level of the building.

_I am the good shepherd…_

He can only hope that he can grab hold of his twin and disappear before-

The giant steel doors have been blown away. The entrance to the reservoir appears like the opening to an oven, glowing red and waving in the heat. The water is molten gold and the ceiling a scary imitation of a blood sunset.

He nearly runs in the room, desperate and scared, but a magically energetic wave drives him back. He tries once again, and succeeds in getting through the doorway.

_Searing eyes and feverish skin, air so energetic and exacerbated he can only see a red red void like his eyes have been branded with a blazing iron._

He feels breath on the side of his neck, breath that is sweetly cool in the turbulent air around him. He turns to face it, but can naught see but the crimson air.

“Kamui.” The voice is by his other ear now, soft and so so sharp.

“So Fuuma delivered. How rare.”

_I am the good shepherd…_

…

Subaru felt something shift, felt something massive change. He could feel the tangible change of magic in the air, as if…

_Seishirou has arrived._

Fuuma’s head was still in his hands.

“I can’t let you leave this room until-.” Fuuma’s voice cracked.

Subaru dashed towards the door, but found it blocked by a powerful enchantment.

“How? What did you do?”

Fuuma stood, still attempting to obscure his face with one hand. He walked towards the window, rippling as he passed through the boundaries of the enchantment.

“I chose my brother. Just like you, Subaru-san.”

Subaru raced forward towards Fuuma, vainly banging on the invisible walls of his enclosure.

“Why? What’s happening? _What did you DO?!”_

“My wish and my brother’s favor came at the same price.”

“NO!” Subaru fell to his knees, his tears painting poetry on his face,

“He will be given a chance to forego his fate. Kamui, I mean. But he won’t. He loves you too much.”

And, much like Kamui before him, Fuuma threw open the window with saddened confidence and jumped into the poison air.

…

“You haven’t changed a bit, Kamui. And still as strong as ever, I presume?”

_Where is Subaru if he’s already killed Subaru –_

“How is Subaru-kun? I can’t wait to see him later.”

_He can feel Seishirou shift behind him, but still cannot see. He moves his arms to slash –_

Kamui’s arms are heavy, heavier than smashed cinder blocks or the guilt and fear from tens of lifetimes. Kamui’s arms are heavy with searing restraints.

“He he. Don’t answer, that’s fine. I just thought you might like to know that Fuuma led me here.”

If Kamui’s eyes could grow any wider, they would. But already they are stretched wide in a useless attempt to see around the pressure.

Now Seishirou is right in front of him, running a thin finger down his cheek.

_I am the good shepherd…_

“There are a couple of ways to kill a vampire that I’ve discovered during my travels. I’m sure you know of a few, Kamui. Starvation, of course, but that takes a while.”

He roughly jabbed Kamui in the stomach, causing the boy to collapse onto his knees in shock.

“Decapitation,” slowly he drew a line with his finger across Kamui’s neck, “but that’s no fun.”

“And my personal favorite. The most fitting, I think. Exsanguination – bleeding to death.”

Kamui had enough pride to growl.

“And how, you ask, do I accomplish that when a vampire can heal itself within seconds?”

He grabbed Kamui’s neck and pulled him close to his face.

“I keep the wound open with my own hands until all Subaru’s precious blood is on the floor.

_I am the good shepherd –_

“But I’ll give you a choice. Fuuma insisted that I give you a choice.”

_I_ am _the good Shepherd –_

“Will you become your brother’s replacement? Will you die in his stead? I will accept it, just this once.”

_\- The good Shepherd giveth His life for the sheep._

The air is still hot and his eyes are still blind, but Kamui can see a crystal light in his brother’s future. He can see Subaru’s grievous freedom.

“Yes.”  


 


	3. Requiem and Interlude

_Minor chords, minor chords rumbling low and sweet and horrible. Trapped in a glass sphere, minor chords making every second a year of dissonance and salt pillar tears and cathedral echoes as you wait, wait knowing that what you wait for is the darkened cross upon the hill – not for you, no, not for you – if only it was for you –_

_There are thorns, your face is streaming and dripping with thorns and thorns and glittering crystal sharp sharp thorns and the thoughts in your head don’t make much sense anymore. No, there are only the minor chords reverberating in the cathedral of your mind._

_There is only the Requiem in the cathedral of your mind and a cross upon the hill._

_Your hands are purple and raw from beating on your prison walls, your voice is splintering from yelling and crying and pleading for a miracle._

_You remember his initial awkwardness when he became your twin. His coldness, his seeming selfishness, his bumbling and embarrassed and denying way of caring for you without wanting you to know-_

_You remember the first time he smiled at you – the first time you had seen him smile – in a world full of light and kindness that was now much too far away. You had, for the first time, called his name casually. You could not help but say his name with familiarity. And he had smiled –_

_Then you recall the way he would stand, one hip higher than the other as if he were standing on uneven ground. He was. So were you. And how elevated his chin was – graceful, proud, a little naïve –_

_You relive the surprise of seeing him cry for the first time, the light sniffling and the hand over his face, trying to hide the traitorous tears collecting around the rims of his eyes -_

_And then you remember how grumpy he was when you tried to wake him up early. And how meticulous he was about how he made his bed. And how angry he became when someone threatened what was his. And how irritated he became when he wasn’t the strongest. And how scared he became when you were sad -_

_And you remember the little puffs he would hum when he was tired, and the way he would toss his shoes in the farthest corner, and the fact that he left the windows opened when it rained and the songs he would sing when he thought you couldn’t hear him and how he waited for YOU –_

_And now you are here and he is gone. You are alone._

Subaru felt something shift, felt something massive change. He could feel the tangible change of magic in the air, as if…

The magic imprisonment shattered like _tearing the veil_ a sheet of ice struck by a bullet. The shards dissipated in a fizzle of colors and Subaru was left in a heap of hopelessness and urgency. And then he was the third to be recklessly leaping out the window, wind tearing the thorns off of his face as he descended to the hill and the cross and his twin and the reservoir.


	4. The Storm

The air is still and molten – burning his skin and his hair and his clothes until he isn’t sure where he ends the air begins anymore. His can see red, nothing but red, no matter how wide he stretches his eyes. His arms are still searingly restrained to his sides, if they are his sides anymore. Is anything really his anymore?

Seishirou still has a hand around his neck. It feels cold – glacial – against his veins. Kamui hates to know that those fingers are growing tighter in anticipation.

His eyes are beginning to water and he is losing strength in his limbs. He hopes that it will just end soon.

So he waits – blindly, solemnly – for Seishirou to deliver death, or at least pain.

And he does.

 

Subaru flew blindly through the air, plummeting towards the ground faster than the stairs would take him. Around and with him rain was falling, mixing with his own tears that are so much more acidic.

He was slightly surprised to see that a serious storm has developed outside, with clouds nearly biting off the tops of skyscrapers and lightning devastating the concrete. He would think about it being unusual, this midday storm, if he had room left in his grief-torn mind.

_If he’s dead…if Kamui’s dead…I’ll return here and try jumping off the top floor. See if that doesn’t make a difference._

He cratered the ground when he landed, like some foreign star descended upon desecrated ground. The wounds of the jolt healed almost immediately, and so he bounded toward the doors and the staircase to the reservoir.

From the entryway he could see that the doors had been blown away and their twisted iron frames littered the hall. A sickly orange radiance came through the doors, silhouetting a large frame in front of them.

_Fuuma._

Already his hands were claws and his eyes were angry slits. He imagined the luxurious sensation of blood dripping down his nails and arms. He almost smiled.

 

He is pinned to something cold – something freezing, with his arms outstretched and useless. He can feel the ice of Seishirou’s magic keeping him there, limp, uncomfortable and waiting.

_Hands pinned, feet stinging, the sky roiling in agony above him._

And suddenly –

_Oh God oh god oh god -_

Sharp fingers, a steel hand, tearing through his skin –

_Goddammitgod –_

Clumsily slicing through his trachea and stealing his _little singing bird_ breath –

_God oh god pleasejustletitend–_

Finding one of those large veins and _squeezing_ until the blood is leaving him _like skylarks when you leave the cage door open._

Kamui can vaguely feel his body trying to heel, trying to rebuild itself around the foreign hand –

_Thrashing thrashing and silently screaming because he has no voice left to speak with-_

Its _useless_ because that claw still holds his vein fluttering vainly in its digits and dripping dripping dripping lifelifelife.

And Seishirou is laughing.

 

Fuuma turned from the door to see Subaru and moved to drive him back with an almost frenzied haste.

He met Subaru’s claws with a long dagger no one really knew he had. The two became interlaced, the inorganic weapon locked with the organic one, faces nearly pressed together in combat.

If not for his rage Subaru would have taken satisfaction from the lack of amusement on Fuuma’s face. He might have noticed the darkened wet lines on Fuuma’s cheeks.

His own was wrinkled in a feral snarl.

“I’m sorry, Subaru-san. You can’t go in there yet. They aren’t quite finished.”

_They aren’t finished – he might be- he might be alive!_

Subaru slashed at him with his other hand, barely catching the side of Fuuma’s head. Fuuma stumbled back a bit, free hand flying to his ribboned ear.

“I will let you pass, unharmed, when they finish. Please wait.”

“NO!” Subaru yelled, voice exuding aggression. “I won’t let you kill him!”

Fuuma flinched. “I’m not…” his expression grew calloused, “Stand back, Subaru. Don’t force me to hurt both of you in one day.”

But even as he spoke, Subaru was surging towards him with his deadly fingers outstretched.

With a gratifying rip he felt his claws tear away at the soft skin of Fuuma’s exposed face.

 

Seishirou looks down at that beautiful little face and smiles. Kamui’s eyes are wide and lacquered with pain, his mouth open in a futile attempt to scream with the vocal cords that aren’t there anymore. Seishirou’s hand is deep in that thin neck, clutching almost desperately onto the throbbing vein and strangling away its essence.

Already the boy’s entire neck and chest are coated in the crimson stuff, glistening like rubies in the orange glow. The more it flows _and it hasn’t slowed yet_ the more the boy trembles and his skin grows cold. It smells – well, it smells like –

Seishirou hasn’t fed in a while, he realizes, and looks down. It would be fitting, he figures, to feed off of this pure-bred creature. To let Subaru see what he has created.

Without removing his hand from inside the boy’s neck, he leans down to the exposed collar bone and begins to lick. He is sure there is blood coating his face now - not that he cares. The warmth trickling down his tongue is well worth the mess. Pure blood – besides his _birth_ with Subaru, he had not yet had the chance to feed off of it – it’s so very rich and potent. It is life.

One life going straight to another, he muses. How very efficient.

 

Subaru did not look back to see Fuuma collapse onto the floor with his bleeding face cradled in his palms. He instead raced forwards towards the scorching entryway, leaping blithely over metal scraps and debris.

He stopped at the threshold. Inside all he could see was a roiling sea of gold, the water burbling and the air dripping and the red red magic infused with it being so so cold making everything so so warm.

It felt like Seishirou.

He charged in, beating back the waves of heat and looking around frantically for his twin. There – in the very center – upon water that was hardened into glass – two figures –

_NononoNoNoNoNO! Please no it can’t be –_

Kamui suspended from the air, hands outstretched and held fast by dancing strands of magic, eyelids lowered and head hanging limply, blood pouring forth and dying his skin and clothes the color of the air, blood pouring forth from the _HAND_

Seishirou’s hand plunged into Kamui’s neck, blood pouring forth and dying his lips and teeth the color of the air, blood pouring forth and Seishirou _FEEDING_

Seishirou feels the boy go limp sometime while he is feeding. He isn’t sure whether the vampire is dead or not, but if not then he must be close. He stops momentarily to look at the boy’s face, now hanging against his chest. His eyes are nearly closed and he has given up on trying to scream. The orange in the air makes the tears on his cheeks and the blood trickling down his chin and his almost lidded eyes glitter like topaz ornaments.

Seishirou leaves his hand in the well, hoping to encourage forth more of that grotesquely fulfilling substance. Its flow has slowed considerably, but not entirely, so he lowers his head again to steal a little life –

Subaru slams into his head with as much force as he can muster. Unprepared for the assault, Seishirou’s hand is torn from Kamui’s throat, and he goes sliding across the magic platform he created above the reservoir, a little crimson stream trailing after him through the air and splattering around his head.

_Kill Seishirou this time I will kill him-_

_Oh God no please don’t be dead I won’t know what to do if you’re dead. I’ll die._

_The adrenaline makes you forget the blood and the death and makes you act._

It does not take long for Subaru to formulate a plan. Seishirou is momentarily distracted with eating Kamui, and although that disturbs Subaru greatly, it is unfortunately to his advantage. He needs to get Seishirou away long enough to touch Kamui – that is enough – and he can whisk them away to another world. The strength of it would be enough to tear Kamui from Seishirou’s bonds, he is sure of that.

And with that hastily sketched plan, he smashes his body into Seishirou’s unsuspecting head.

_The numbness of disbelief is what allowed Subaru to wrench those talons from that neck and send the monster flying…_

He wastes no more time with the monster. He races to Kamui, still suspended and limp, and reaches out to grab a part of him – any part of him – and manages to get a hand on his _artic cheek._

The runes of travel swirl around the twins and lift them into a black void. The red magic around Kamui finally dissipates and he falls into Subaru’s arms as they whisk across dimensions.

_He is cold, all of him, he is hyperborean, and very still. Subaru hopes to at least hear strangled breathing but then realizes that Kamui no longer has the organs in his neck to breathe with._

The tears start up again, this time flicking off his face and being forever suspended between the worlds. Subaru holds his little brother close and sobs into his back, choking and wailing and _hopinghopinghoping_ that when they land he will be able to detect a pulse in that boreal frame lying listless across his chest.


	5. Genesis I

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Subaru-san. Your first task is to go subdue our guest and bring him to me.” Subaru’s look of confusion had yet to leave his face.
> 
> “Subdue him…?”
> 
> “Quickly, before he kills my servant.”

  1. Genesis I



_Subaru’s wish had been to flee. He had used the bulk of his magical ability to fly from his home world and land in the witch’s dimension. He arrived – clothing torn, face bruised, eyes forlorn – right on her front yard. She had been waiting for him._

_Tall, shapely, intimidating - she was even more worthy than the myths of his world had painted her. So he was a little surprised when, without even hearing a single frantic word he was saying, she offered him a long-fingered hand and took him inside her shop._

_The assistant offered him dry cloths and a room to change into them. When he noticed Subaru eyeing them with confusion, he turned a bright red (heavens knows why) and gave him a quick overview on the general structure and wearing of Japanese clothing._

_He emerged from the room, clothed in warm, bright orange. She had been waiting for him again, this time with a lazy smile hanging loosely from her lips._

_She silently led him to another room and sat down on the floor, motioning for Subaru to do the same. After he had, she finally stated, “You have a wish.”_

_“I do.”_

_“I know your wish. I have seen it. Are you sure this is what you want?”_

_“I…” No. No he wasn’t sure. NO. He wanted to shout and scream until she understood because he loved him he LOVED him –_

_“He will follow you.”_

_“I know.” He had known this since before he had changed Seishirou into a vampire, and long before this he had known the man’s true intentions were far from pure. But that didn’t change anything. Maybe Subaru wanted him to follow._

_“You could have ended him. You could still end him.”_

_“No. I couldn’t. I can’t!”_

_“So now you choose to run?”_

_“That is my wish.”_

_She was silent for a minute. He couldn’t meet her eyes. The assistant – the one from before, with the glasses and the odd eyes – came in with a small tray. The witch lifted a long pipe off of it and waved the boy away. He left in no small hurry._

_“This is not a wish that you can pay for alone. There will be another involved.”_

_“What?” His eyes jerked up towards hers._

_“There will be another arriving soon. His wish is similar to yours. Among other things, the condition of the wish will be that you travel together. Do you understand the implications of this?”_

_Subaru thought for a long minute, fists clenched and eyebrows heavy._

_“Seishirou is only hunting for me. He would not go after a bystander.”_

_“Can you really believe that after what he did to your sister?”_

_Subaru’s eyes flashed gold. His hands trembled in repressed anger as he stared directly into the witch’s crimson eyes._

_“This_ Other _,” he stopped at hearing the roughness in his voice and took a deep inhale, “This Other,” his irises returned to green and his arms stopped trembling, “is not my sister. As long as he remains uninvolved, he will be safe.”_

_“How do you know that he will remain uninvolved?”_

_Subaru tilted his head, disturbingly surprised by the question. He opened his mouth to respond, although he wasn’t quite sure he had one yet, when –_

_“Mistress! The other one has arrived!”_

_“Yes, he’s arrived! And he isn’t being very nice to Watanuki-kun!”_

_Two little girls were in the doorway now, one with short rose hair and the other with periwinkle curls. The pink haired one looked back over her shoulder and said, “Ah! Hurry Mistress! The guest is getting a little panicked!”_

_“Subaru-san. Your first task is to go subdue our guest and bring him to me.” Subaru’s look of confusion had yet to leave his face._

_“Subdue him…?”_

_“Quickly, before he kills my servant.”_

_Subaru let the two little girls lead him (their small, warm hands wrapped around his) towards the front door. As he drew closer, he could hear the frenzied voice of this ‘Watanuki-kun.”_

_“Now just calm dow – AHH! I said cal –ARGH! Will you stop that already?! You almost hit – CALM DOWN DAMMIT I’M NOT GOING TO HURT YOU!”_

_Subaru sprinted out the front door as soon as saw the young vampire assaulting Watanuki. The creature (no taller than himself) was swinging his claws about in a panicked fashion and bearing his fangs like a cornered animal. Watanuki was dodging the razor talons and attempting to reason with the boy – although didn’t look as terrible as he should have, seeing he was being attacked by a predator –_

_Subaru realized, as he met the stranger’s claws with his own, that the vampire he was fighting with was startling young. Although the boy appeared to be a teenager – with wild dark hair and a pretty porcelain face – he had probably only been changed very recently. It would explain why, in his panicked haste, he was flinging his claws around like he didn’t know what to do with them._

_Subaru was able to use the boy’s age to his advantage, and it was within moments that he had the young stranger thrashing vainly beneath him, with both hands (claws now retracted) pinned above him in the dirt._

_Subaru looked down at the boy’s face, even as he spoke to Watanuki._

_“Watanuki-san.”_

_“Yes?”_

_“Are you hurt?”_

_“No.”_

_“Good. Then please bring me something to restrain him with.”_

_Subaru did not look up as Watanuki retreated into the house. Instead, he studied the face beneath him. The stranger’s large eyes had faded from gold and were now a sparkling amethyst, glittering both from hue and from fear. He could not help but note that the stranger shared his own delicate facial features with his thin, straight nose and round mouth._

_The stranger was returning his gaze, although it looked as though he couldn’t decide whether to be scared or defiant._

_“Let…let go of me.”_

_Subaru blinked and jerked a little bit, surprised to hear words coming from the stranger’s mouth. He had somehow not taken into account that the young vampire could speak._

_“L-let go of me now!”_

_The stranger’s tone was a little more forceful, although his visibly trembling body belied a barely controlled fear._

_Subaru did not know how to respond, though he had enough sense to keep one of his hands tightly around the stranger’s wrists. The stranger stopped thrashing and watched him with a suspicious stare. So with no other option presenting itself, Subaru asked rather dumbly, “What is your name?”_

_The stranger narrowed his eyes in an obvious attempt to look intimidating. “Why do you want to know?” The struggling resumed._

_Watanuki returned from the house with a long black rope in his hands. Subaru eyed it a little hopelessly._

_“I’m sorry; Watanuki-san, but that won’t hold a vampire.”_

_“Yuuko gave it to me.”_

_Subaru looked down tiredly at the vampire struggling beneath him. His eyes had returned to gold as soon as he saw the rope._

_“I guess it’s worth a try. I’m sorry about this, Stranger-san.” And with his guilt-laden preemptive apology, Subaru, with his free hand, knocked the young vampire into an unconscious stupor. Subaru tied the limp hands together tightly and stood up to face Watanuki._

_“What should I do with him now?”_

_“Bring him to Yuuko-san. It’s her problem now.”_

_Subaru could not help but think that there was something wrong with this ‘Watanuki’._


	6. VI. Genesis II

  1. Genesis II



_Subaru carried the unconscious boy inside with Watanuki, although he was much more interested in studying the vampire than in listening to Watanuki’s ongoing stream of complaints. The little girls – Maru and Moro, Watanuki had called them – directed him back into the low, dark room where Yuuko was still sitting and smoking. She motioned for Subaru to sit again._

_“What should I do with him?”_

_“Just put him down next to you. He’ll be waking up soon enough.”_

_“Who is he?”_

_“Your companion.” Subaru flinched. After the violent display in the courtyard, he could easily think of many other people he would rather be traveling with…_

_“Where is he from?”_

_“I have no more right to disclose his past to strangers than I right have to disclose yours.”_

_“But certainly we must know something of each other if we are going to be traveling across worlds together?”_

_“There are perhaps a handful of things you should know concerning him, just as there are a number of things about yourself you should share with him. Firstly, he is pureblood, like you.”_

_“You’re wrong.” Subaru countered. Yuuko smiled lightly at him, but stayed silent. “I saw him fighting out there – he’s only recently been changed. He was human.”_

_“And now he is pureblood.”_

_“That’s not possible -.”_

_“There are many things that are possible in his world that are not possible in yours.” Subaru shamelessly let a look of disbelief settle on his face._

_“Anything else?” He asked, aware that the question addressed to the dimensional witch was perhaps not the most polite._

_“He is, like you, fleeing. That is what he perceives as his true wish. But I know what his true wish is, as I know yours.”_

_“I have no other wish.”_

_Yuuko resumed her annoyingly light smile and let a silence settle._

_“Who-I-what?” A foggy voice cut through the quiet._

_Subaru looked over to his left, where the other vampire was now sitting up and growling down at the restraint around his wrists in guarded confusion. “I…” his gaze focused on Subaru. Subaru noticed a slight strain in the boy’s eyes, as if they were struggling to streak gold. The boy probably didn’t have the energy to personify his anger._

_“That hurt.” An annoying shade of snark colored the boy’s voice. It sounded a little sharp, but the boy was too disoriented to be all that dangerous. Subaru couldn’t help but roll his eyes._

_“I’m sorry.” And he was, a little._

_“Finally.” Yuuko said with a growing grin, “Welcome, Kamui-san. I’ve - we’ve - been waiting for you.”_

_The stranger – Kamui – frowned. Then, with a start, he swung his head wildly to survey his surroundings as if looking for someone._

_“They aren’t here.” Yuuko remarked with surprising sternness, “They won’t be coming here.”_

_“How do I know that you aren’t lying?” Kamui clenched his head in perceived distress. “How do I know that you aren’t one of them?”_

_The witch sighed and shook her head. “I don’t really care whether or not you believe me. If it’s too much for you to take in, I could always send you back-.”_

_“No!”_

_“Then why don’t you listen quietly like the polite boy I know that you can be, and maybe Subaru-san will even be kind enough to untie you afterwards.”_

_Subaru was surprised to see Kamui look down and be quiet._

_“Kamui-san, do you know where you are?”_

_“No.”_

_“Do you know how you got here?”_

_“No.”_

_“Subaru-san, would you please inform Kamui-san as to where he is?”_

_“Kamui-san…” he began, looking straight at the other boy. As he suspected, the boy’s head was down, but his purple irises were fixed on Subaru with detached attention._

_“This is Yuuko-san.” He motioned one hand towards the reclined woman, “We are in her shop. She is a granter of wishes.”_

_“For a price.” She interjected._

_“For a price.” Subaru resumed, “If you are here, then you probably have a wish that she intends to grant.”_

_“Thank you, Subaru-san. Does that make sense, Kamui-san?”_

_Kamui nodded._

_“Do you have a wish, Kamui-san?”_

_“I…,” he began, and finally lifted his head to look at Yuuko, “You said they aren’t here?”_

_“They are not.”_

_“I don’t think that you can – they said it was impossible – can you change me back?”_

_“I’m sorry. There are very few things that I cannot do, but your change was permanent.”_

_“Then my wish is that they never find me again.”_

_“That wish is perhaps more expensive than you imagine.”_

_“No.” Subaru noted that the boy’s body was beginning to tremble._

_“They will pursue you.”_

_“Still, I – no. No, no, no. Anything. I will pay anything! I never imagined that I would escape them. No…I…anything. You can take anything.” As Kamui shook, his eyes were fixed on the witch, and glazed with unshed tears._

_Subaru had quietly scooted closer to the boy and extended a finger to cut his binds. Kamui gave no indication of noticing that the ropes had fallen from his wrists._

_“Then you and Subaru-san shall pay the price for your wishes together. I will give you the means to flee, but you must always remain together. That is the price. And for this you shall be twins.”_

_Subaru and Kamui were looking at each other._

_“Do you accept?”_

Subaru held Kamui’s body tight to his chest as they were flung in between worlds. He sobbed into that dark, blood-drenched hair, regretting and regretting and regretting because it didn’t have to be this way and he knew it. He had had a choice to avert this, long ago, and he didn’t.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you very much for reading. This story is also associated with another of my stories, 'Concerning Crimson Stars and Distant Skies' and 'Cradle of Wreckage', both of which I will be posting periodically.


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